Two for Flinching!

Am I the only parent that finds themselves constantly bracing for impact at this age (there's not mine)? It seems like, at any moment, they might swing around with that block they're playing with and bash me on the head. Or when we're exploring the features of the face ("that's Daddy's mouth, that's Daddy's nose, that's deep inside Daddy's nose") one of those fingers always seems on the brink of gouging out my eye. I get my hair pulled, my ankles smashed, my toes stepped on. ... it kind of feels like being Jack Hannah; sure they're cute and cuddly, but they've got teeth and tempers too. And it's not just the physical violence, it's also the psychological. Like last night, Arianna and I were playing on the floor - she thinks it's down right hilarious to sit on my lap and squeeze the air out of my cheeks to make a farty noise with my mouth. So I'm bracing because her hands are up on my face (she's a known eye gouger), she's sitting on my lap (Dad's always have to watch this region. ... just watch an episode of America's Funniest Home Videos) and on top of it she's got this runny nose, so the more she's laughing the bigger this snot bubble in her right nostril is getting and, like a scientist on an active volcano I know it's going to blow some day soon. I'm watching the thing inflate and then deflate a little; inflate more; deflate a little. ... it's like a scene from "The Blob", it's an uncontainable force. And what happened? Well, she successfully wiped the snot bubble on my shirt as she belly laughed so hard she leaned in to me. ... and then bit my shoulder. I suppose I deserved two for flinching in the first place.