Saturday, July 25, 2015

Sweet Baby Lorelei

I have a new goal; to blog consistently once more.  Perhaps I'll need to find time in the evening to do so, now that my day light hours are so booked - but I'm on it.  And for good reason.  The Kopp Girls are now a quartet.  On June 19th, only 2 weeks before she was due, our little Lorelei made her appearance.  There's not much to say about her yet - she eats and sleeps and poops. ... and poops - but I'm sure she'll come with plenty of new stories to share with you all as the weeks progress.
I've already noticed the dynamic change of 3 to 4. ... it's like moving from the realm of non-fiction into science fiction.  To put that better, there's the book you read about a real experience and you can compute exactly how everything in the plot came about.  Then there's the book about an interplanetary battle between humanoid rabbits and a subspecies of foot fungus that's gained self awareness.  The words all make sense in your brain but the concept still leaves you going "how could this ever be a real thing?!"  Every time we make a simple journey to the store or someone's house, I feel like I lose track of the headcount because the numbers so high and there are so many moving parts.  It's like counting fish; everyone stop moving and looking so damn much alike. And they do!  They all look exactly the same some times.  And Lorelei, though her hair seems a little darker thus far, is nearly a carbon copy of the rest, right down to her bright blue eyes.  I feel we're not so much procreating as we are simply cloning at this point.

And the questions are a little different when you're dragging around 4.  People used to ask "are you going to try for that boy?"  And they always had this smarmy way of saying it like they weren't serious.  Now people feel like they're egging us on. ... as if we'd already passed some point of sanity so the next stop is Duggar station.  People don't even mention the "boy" card any more, simply when is number five coming?  And there's that little part of you that wonders "why not?"  As the weeks go on I'll be reminded exactly why not. 

Gina sent me an article recently that talked about how hard it is once you've "decided" this is your last baby.  I think many people with one, two or three never officially close that door, it's just kind of how things round out.  But for those that decide, this is the last one, you then start to realize all of these "last firsts" that you'll go through.  Last first smile, last first steps, last first word.  And it really makes you teary to dwell on it.  Of course it'll also be the last first tantrum.  The last first "some how I got shit in my mouth and I'm not even near the baby".  The last first puke on my new suit jacket.  The last first who put my watch in the toilet.  The last first we  haven't slept all night and I have a presentation in zzzzzzzzz.  So yes, it will be emotional, and amongst those emotions will be a little hint of joy and maybe a slightly heavier pour of longing.  We'll see.  And you will too.  Assuming I'm able to keep up  my half of this new bargin.

Here we go!

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