Well, Arianna received her first war wound today. The Elephant Rocking "Horse" at Grandma's house, with it's alluring eyes (quite literally the plastic eyelid around the glass eye), scratched up her leg something fierce. There was even blood on the inside of her pants. And the sight of blood (OK, a very slight hint of red that didn't even bleed through to the other side) is enough to send new parents into a google induced panic. Can we use neosporin, is hydrogen peroxide ok on infants, will bacitracin stain a onsie - and more importantly is it pronounced back-si-trace-in or bass-eh-trass-in? An overkill of sterilization and an unnecessary application of gauze later and we're now watching the signs of infection to see if amputation is needed. ... this is the same guy who has been to a doctor only once in the last decade and has no concern when I lop off a digit with blunt knife, now seriously stressing about a scratch that will most likely be gone in the morning. This is stressful. What happens when she breaks an arm, catches the flu or goes on a date? At least one is cured by intimidation and an unloaded firearm, but all are going to induce a cold sweat and a coronary. How am I supposed to make it 18 full years? Maybe I should buy stock in bubble wrap and surgical masks. That should take care of almost anything. ... including scaring off any potential dates.
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