Tuesday, December 27, 2011
There's something to be said for snuggle time. First of all, it's never long enough. It could last for 48 hours straight and I'd still be content just sitting there; holding her. But as that child of yours lays in to your chest, the life form that came from you merging back in to you again. ... it's the most peaceful and surreal moment this world can offer up. And yes, I'm getting a lot of current snuggle time from Rosaline, but it's just as magical when I get a moment of it from the twins. Yesterday morning Genevieve crawled in to bed with me and laid down on my chest. Aside from feeling like an anchor had just been dropped on me, I wrapped my arms around her and threatened to never let go. We just lay there for 10 minutes or so. Gina fed the baby in the other room and Arianna caught a few more minutes of sleep. But the two of us, under the big green comforter just basked in the warmth of a good snuggle. These moments are fleeting. At 2 there's something to be said for clamoring in to bed with dad and pressing against him. At 5 the gravitational pull of cartoons might start to win out. Then by 10 it's a video game and by 13 it's just not "cool". By 18 she'll be out the door with her own agenda and by 25. ... well. ... she may be gone. When she does come home I'm sure I'll get a hug, a strong embrace; a quick grip of love and then a quicker release of independence. I won't be able to hold her. To play with her dirty blond hair. To softly pinch her ears and press her open hand against mine; measuring the difference in size. She won't want to "hide" with me under the covers, or lay her head on my chest as if to listen to my heart. It's not her fault. ... big girls just don't do that. And I know this. Big boys don't do this either - and I'm sure my mom misses the days of her little tote headed admirer clamoring in to her bed to do the same. So, as a wise man, I drink in this moment. I remember the sound of every silent breath. The warmth of her cheeks. The softness of her hair. The deep blue eyes that look into mine, through my very soul and straight in to the deepest channels of my heart. Such a silly word: "snuggle". But my. ... what a profound and earth shattering effect.
at 7:38 AM